Where have I been

Where have I been, well running around like a chicken with my head cut off.  I have been doing some soul searching and what the heck I want out of this life, the only one I get.  With everything that is going on in the World where can we turn to peace.  I have found music to be a refuge for me.  There is so much sadness and people being people that one can loose faith of what the goal is.  I have been planing a birthday party for my daughter who will be turning 15 next year.  I know that the area which I have chosen to live in is mostly caucasian and they don't always understand latin traditions just like I don't understand why they eat nasty food for Thanksgiving.  I've  mostly positive respond from people about the party and some who just have been flat out rude.  Look buddy I have adjusted to your culture as much as I can but for peat sake don't be rude just because you don't understand my culture.  I have seen my daughter realized that I have lied to her about people and how they are.  She asked some of her friends to dance the traditional dance and some where so excited to embrace something new while other were almost disrespectful.  I have tried to teach my child that people are people and they will make dumb choices (me included) my problem is that I have sheltered my kids too much from this reality that now I feel like I have failed them.  I feel like they may not be prepare for the cruel World in which we live.  I have started talking to them more about how it was when I was growing up in the Mission District of San Francisco California.  We took a trip to SF this past week and I took the train into the city and my daughter had a reality check of what the city can really be like.  I consider my self an attractive women but in the city I can not go anywhere with out some sexual remark being made about my body.  My daughter in my eyes is beautiful and while walking in the city we got a lot of comments.  I want her to know how to handle some of this  remarks.  She is a very smart, talented girl (can you tell I am bias).  We visited family while there and  my aunts funeral.  It was such a different feeling when we told the family there about the Quinceanera for my daughter but was taken back by one of the questions I got.  My second cousin asked me if my husband who's white was okay with that? I have never thought about it.  Why wouldn't he be? he knew I was of a different culture? why would he expect something different?  I just kept thinking about and realized that he was not okay with it at the begging when we were first married but later he too learned to embraced my culture they way I have embraced his.  Money is tight and yet he has never said to me that the party could not be done in fact he asked if I had asked his family to help cover some of the cost.  In the latin culture it is custom to ask family members to help pay for some of the items.  To make everything more fun were not catholic but members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  In our church we don't celebrated Quinceaneras since is mostly a Latin catholic tradition which I feel we should continue in our half white half spanish family.   At the end of the day I will continue to be who I am a loud, proud Nica!!